She called me after her
Girlfriend went back to Brazil,
Finally allowed to see me again,
And I went to her flat,
One bed, two toothbrushes,
The shell of relationship
Always born to die,
And I didn’t want to be there,
But I’m not one to let a girl cry alone.
And I’d been waiting for this anyways,
I’m that girl you don’t
want your partner to meet,
I’d actually met her girlfriend once,
Long enough for her to imply
that they were a package deal,
I could get both or nothing,
And I’d started laughing
before I could stop myself.
But she wasn’t here now,
And we went out to the terrace,
Enjoying the first warm day
Of a Mediterranean spring,
Getting drunk off of cheap beer,
And we went back downstairs,
Down where the sadness lived,
She took out her pipe,
Laughed when I got lipstick on it
But looked at my lips as she wiped it off.
She was watching me sleep
When I woke up a couple hours later,
Not in the bed,
I’m not that shameless about it,
Clothes on, forcing her to make the choice,
And she was looking at me
Like she’d already decided,
But she wasn’t happy about it,
Knowing it wasn’t wrong,
But not feeling justified
Enough to commit to it.
And for what?
A girl that wouldn’t
Always come home at night?
But I smiled at her reassuringly,
And left, not willing to stay in the middle,
Of a heartbreak I don’t even want to fix.